Second star to the right...

... and straight on till morning. It's very weird sometimes how my mind works. (No comments on that one) After my post yesterday I went and looked up Michael W Smith for music. He has this story about the first time he ever saw his wife you should check out. It's one of those love at first sight stories. As much as I say I don't believe in it, I want it. Kinda fucked up, I know. I thought about it all day yesterday. Every song I heard just dug it deeper. With each song all I think is do I mean that much to him? I want to. Have I earned that spot in his heart? Then I mourn the fact that I don't believe in it any longer. I grew up a dreamer. I wanted that knight in shinning armor and the happily ever after. Then life hit. To say I'm a bit jaded is an understatment. Now I don't know what to believe. Currently this is were I stand though. Nothing in life is perfect. I really still want a man that thinks I hung the moon and stars, but I believe that I have to earn that. I still wish upon stars every chance I get. I look forward to that happily ever after, but I know you have to work at that too. It all goes back to one my quotes "the more one knows, the less one believes." I hate growing up. I've always said it's down hill from 16. I guess what I want is someone to prove me wrong. I want to believe again. For now my fairy tale is a costume that comes off at the end of the day. I do know that a few thousand miles away there is a great man that will always believe in me, my dad. I also learned the other day that my sister thinks fairly highly of me too.


Please feel free to comment on this one. It can come from anyone. Tell me your feelings on that white horse and the castle in the clouds.